Unlocking Inner Strength and Self-Discovery happens only through embracing solitude.
Let’s face it – the idea of being alone is scary for a lot of people. And this idea of mindfulness is beyond what most think they are capable of. We live in a world where we’re constantly connected and the thought of spending time by ourselves might feel downright uncomfortable. But here’s the thing: solitude isn’t just about being alone; it’s about being comfortable in your own company. And let me tell you, it’s a game-changer.
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The Difference Between Loneliness and Solitude
First things first, let’s clear up a common misconception. Loneliness and solitude are not the same thing. Loneliness is that ache you feel when you’re disconnected from others. It’s the pit in your stomach when you feel as if you don’t have a close confidant or someone to keep you company.
Solitude, on the other hand? It’s chosen. It’s deliberate. It’s you saying, “Hey, I’m going to hang out with myself for a bit, and I’m cool with that.” It’s not about being anti-social; it’s about being pro-you.
And the gift of solitude is one that never stops giving. Getting comfortable with yourself is so transformative.
Why Solitude Matters
Now, you might be wondering, “Why should I bother with this solitude stuff?” Well, buckle up, because the benefits are pretty awesome:
- Self-Discovery: When was the last time you really sat down and thought about what makes you tick? Solitude gives you the space to explore your thoughts, feelings, and desires without the noise of other people’s opinions. Checkout this post on the power of self-discovery here.
- Creativity Boost: Ever notice how your best ideas come when you’re in the shower or taking a walk alone? That’s no coincidence. Solitude allows your mind to wander and make new connections. Creativity is so powerful and the solitude allows us to tap into flow state. Watch this short video from the Blossom Your Awesome Podcast on Flow State here.
- Emotional Regulation: Spending time alone helps you get in touch with your emotions. It’s like hitting the reset button on your emotional state.
- Increased Productivity: Without the distractions and others around, you can really dive deep into tasks and enter that sweet flow state.
- Better Relationships: Ironically, spending time alone can make your relationships stronger. You bring a more centered, self-aware version of yourself to your interactions.
The Challenge of Embracing Solitude
I get it – embracing solitude isn’t always easy. We live in a world that’s constantly buzzing. Notifications ping, group chats ding, and FOMO (fear of missing out) is real. But here’s a little secret: the world won’t fall apart if you take some time for yourself. Checkout my write up No FOMO on my substack here.
The first step is often the hardest. It might feel weird or even a little selfish to carve out alone time. But trust me, it’s worth pushing through that initial discomfort.
Practical Ways to Embrace Solitude
Alright, so you’re sold on the idea of solitude. But how do you actually make it happen? Here are some ideas to get you started:
- Start Small: You don’t need to go on a week-long silent retreat (unless that’s your thing). Start with 15 minutes a day of uninterrupted alone time.
- Create a Solitude Ritual: Maybe it’s a morning cup of coffee before everyone else wakes up, or an evening walk around the block. Find a time that works for you and make it a habit.
- Unplug: Turn off your phone, close your laptop, and just be with your thoughts. It might feel uncomfortable at first, but stick with it.
- Try Solo Activities: Take yourself out to lunch, go to a movie alone, or try a new hobby that doesn’t require a partner.
- Journal: Writing down your thoughts can be a powerful way to process emotions and ideas during your alone time.
- Meditate: Even just five minutes of meditation can help you get comfortable with stillness and silence. Read this post on getting started with mindfulness.
A Great Resource For Embracing Solitude
Be sure to download my Ultimate Self-Inquisition Guide. This guide is my signature creation after decades journeying inward and learning from the greats. This guide teaches you the art of Self-Inquisition and will help you get clear on areas in life that have you stuck. Through a series of contemplative questions it will help you feel more at ease and make this idea of self-inquiry and sitting in solitude with your thoughts more effortless.
Overcoming the Fear of Solitude
Let’s be real – the thought of being alone with your thoughts can be intimidating. What if you don’t like what you find? What if you get bored? What if you miss out on something important?
These fears are normal, but they don’t have to hold you back. Remember, embracing solitude is a skill. Like any skill, it takes practice. Be patient with yourself. If uncomfortable thoughts or feelings come up, that’s okay. Acknowledge them, sit with them, and let them pass. The Ultimate Self-Inquisition Guide will help!
The Paradox of Solitude
Here’s a mind-bender for you: spending time alone can actually make you feel more connected. When you’re comfortable with yourself, you bring a stronger, more authentic version of yourself to your relationships. You’re not relying on others to fill a void; you’re choosing to share your complete self with them.
Solitude in the Digital Age
In our hyper-connected world, true solitude can feel like a luxury. But it’s more important than ever. Constant connectivity can leave us feeling scattered and drained. Solitude is the antidote. It’s a chance to recharge, refocus, and reconnect with ourselves.
A Personal Challenge
So, here’s my challenge to you: carve out some intentional alone time. Maybe it’s a solo walk in nature, a quiet morning with your thoughts, or an afternoon at a café with a good book. Whatever you choose, approach it with curiosity and openness.
Pay attention to how you feel before, during, and after your solitude practice. You might be surprised at the insights and energy that bubble up when you give yourself the gift of alone time.
Remember, embracing solitude isn’t about isolating yourself. It’s about building a strong foundation of self-awareness and inner peace that you can carry into all areas of your life. It’s about becoming comfortable in your own skin, so you can show up more fully in the world.
So go ahead, embrace the power of solitude. Your future self will thank you for it.
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